Everything is a Grace

Hello there! My name is Matthew(Max) Pape, and this is my first year in seminary. I am a pre-theologian studying for the diocese of Springfield, MA. I am from Woodbury, Connecticut originally, but I got affiliated with the diocese of Springfield while studying at Springfield College. While there, I earned a bachelor’s degree in psychology. We recently finished our first two weeks and I would like to reminisce on some of what my experiences were like.

I arrived on Sunday and started my new adventure unexpectedly. I made the trip to DC with my father, who graciously sacrificed his only day off to drive me to the seminary. Upon arriving, my dad and I stopped at a sandwich shop about a mile off campus. Since we were early, we figured we could hide in the parking lot of the seminary so I could eat my sandwich before move-in began. It was a risky move, considering throughout my life I’ve been told that first impressions are of great importance. Despite knowing this, I unexpectedly made my first impression with Father Regan, the vice-rector of the seminary, with a mouthful of a subway sandwich. 

Though this was an embarrassing first encounter, orientation week has taught me to view my humiliations with a supernatural outlook. The supernatural outlook was explained during the last conference given to wrap up orientation. During the talk, I learned that a supernatural outlook can be analogous to wearing corrective lenses. From a physical standpoint, this analogy stood out considering I wear corrective lenses for my poor vision. However, orientation taught me the ways in which my vision is also impaired spiritually. I learned that the blurriness of my embarrassments, insecurities, and several other seeming shortcomings has blinded me from receiving divine graces. St Therese of Lisieux said that everything is a grace, and when putting on the corrective lenses of the supernatural outlook, I am beginning to see more clearly what she means by that. The Holy Spirit wants to use my humiliations, my faults, and my weaknesses to form me into the man that I was created to become. Therefore, I am beginning to rejoice in my quirky awkwardness of being the new kid at the seminary since it graces me with the opportunity to grow in humility.

Furthermore, I’ve been inspired to grow in humility by witnessing the actions of my new brothers. Their example of humble service has demonstrated for me the formation that I aspire to undergo during my time here at the seminary. Some stories stand out. For example, my anxiety on move-in day was soothed by the warm greeting of my brother Graham Fassero. Also, when taking a tour of the seminary, my door was generously opened by my brother John Murphy. In addition, on the metro, my brother Justin Seidleck spotted me without hesitation. And when being stressed out about not being registered for classes, my brother Matthew Fichter took me under his wing and helped me out. These are just a few of the many stories in which my brothers have uplifted me since my arrival, and I am looking forward to continuing to learn from their acts of humble service throughout this coming year! 

Mr. Pape is a first pre-theologian studying for the diocese of Springfield, Massachusetts.