Paying the Price, Reaping the Rewards

The last thing I want to do is write about coronavirus. However, over the last few days, it has been on my mind quite a bit.

Last Saturday, a few brother seminarians and I went to Assateague Island to soak up the last beach rays of summer. Some soaked up more rays than others. On the car ride back, I received news that I had close contact with someone positive with Covid-19 and would have to quarantine. The joys of summer quickly turned into complaining. I immediately began to bemoan my fate. “Why me?” I exclaimed loudly in my head. “What if I just hadn’t sat next to him at that one meal? This is going to mess up my whole schedule!” A few days into this quarantine experience, the Lord’s voice rings loud and clear - “That’s kind of the point.”

At the beginning of every seminary year, our rector delivers the seminarian-favorite “Supernatural Outlook” talk. At the forefront of this talk is a daunting question, “How much does God’s existence change my life?” As a seminarian, and even more fundamentally as a Christian, my answer to this question must be nothing less than, “it changes everything.” During trial or even monotony, it can be easy to forget that God is still with us and to miss the graces He offers. But a believer in Christ handles the circumstances of life differently. He sees things through “heaven’s eyes” (see The Prince of Egypt). 

This week, I’ve had to put Supernatural Outlook into practice. I was masked up, limited to mostly my own room and a separate bathroom, and I couldn’t go down to CUA for class. I was also unable to attend the usual house liturgies and meals. However, all was not lost! In fact, it was an incredible and grace-filled time of seeing the fatherhood of the faculty and the brotherhood of the other seminarians shine in a whole new way.

Three times a day, our infirmarian team (usually assisted by a host of other eager seminarians) brought food to my room. Throughout the day and in-between their own classes on campus and other duties around the seminary, brother seminarians stopped by to check in and see how I was doing. Sometimes, they stopped by so often that it was hard to stay focused on schoolwork! The faculty also graciously rearranged their schedules to offer a separate Mass for me so that I could continue to receive our Lord and make Him the center of my day.

I expected this time of quarantine to be a heavy blow. I envisioned an environment of terrible food, isolation, and no opportunity to encounter Jesus in the Eucharist. That could all have been true had it not been for the abundant outpouring of paternal and fraternal charity from the seminary community. It could have been easy to believe that I was merely “paying the price” for an unfortunate close contact encounter. Instead, I was rewarded with graces from my brothers who love to serve. They helped me correct my sight to see reality as it really is. Right now, reality is not wallowing in being inconvenienced by Covid. Rather, it is seeing this time as a blessing from God to grow in gratitude and Supernatural Outlook. Sure, Covid has messed up my schedule -  but I can see more clearly the love of God being poured upon me by those whom I call my brothers and fathers. As I prepare to resume normal seminary life, I now realize that there might be no better place to quarantine than St. John Paul II Seminary.

Mr. Oursler is a College IV seminarian for the Archdiocese of Baltimore.